KILLER BISCUITS

[ellanoize]

KILLER BISCUITS WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (The
actual AP headline)

Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws and while there, went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries.
Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up, her eyes closed with both hands behind the back of her head.

One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she'd been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour. The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head.


When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit canister from the back seat had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head.

When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid.

Linda is a blonde and a Democrat, but I'm certain that's irrelevant.

[Mer]

LMFAO aww thats so sad for her but funny as all hell for the rest of us lol wouldnt she realize she wasnt bleeding? :| lol aww poor lady

LMFAO btw i love the addition of the blonde comment lol

[Rogue Angel]

OH... MY... GOD. that is fuckin craaaaaaaaaazy!!! that poor woman... *screamlaughs*.... omgomg... it's terrible... but strangely hysterical....

"oh my brains!!!!".... *chuckle*..... dear goodness.... [img]tongue.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/devil.gif[/img]

[Rogue Angel]

*keeps waiting for the canadian joke*.... i know it will happen eventually... i can sense the evil lurking..... lol... [img]confused.gif[/img]

[Mer]

LMAO eh at least we're not THAT bad..for the most part..lol

[Rogue Angel]

lol, i guess she never realized it wasn't bleeding... she was too scared to move her hands away and check it out. I'll bet that took 10 full years off of her life. yikes. [img]confused.gif[/img]

[ellanoize]

She said she passed out when she reached back and felt her "brains" Oozing out. Its funny now, but could you imagine the thoughts running through your mind.

[Mer]

would suck pritty badly! lol poor lady but it still makes me laugh! lol

[BlackMagicRose]

I've heard a few of these incidences happening...LMAO. It makes me wonder what all they put in those biscuit wrappers to give them that much velocity...LOL [img]eek.gif[/img]